Picking up the Pieces
by dreamscarred
Summary: After Randy's melt down, Evan and Cody turn to the one man they know can get through to Randy and ask for his help in saving the shattered Viper. This is a follow on to The Trials of Love. You do not need to have read that to follow this fic. Slash NC17
1. Chapter 1

Title:Picking up the Pieces  
Author: **dreamscarred** and **candy_belle**  
Rating: NC-17  
Warnings: fluff, flirting, angst and mentions of past abuse but nothing explict within this fic  
Characters: Randy Orton, John Cena, Cody Rhodes, Evan Bourne, mention of Hunter  
Summary: After Randy's melt down, Evan and Cody turn to the one man they know can get through to Randy and ask for his help in saving the shattered Viper. This is a follow on to **The Trials of Love** but you do not need to have read that to follow this fic.  
Beta:none all mistakes are your own, so please forgive us for any errors.  
Disclaimer:We own nothing but we wish we did.

Evan pulled the car into the parking spot. He was early but that was ok, he needed time to think. He pulled the rear view mirror down, studying his swollen face that had been caused by a man he loved more than life itself. Softly he touched the purple bruising on his nose, feeling the definite crack in it. The doctor had set it and told him there would only a slight curve to when it was healed due to it being a clean break.

Evan knew Randy hadn't been in control the other night, that his past had consumed him. Both he and Cody knew this and had already forgiven him a thousand times over. The harrowing story Randy had told them had made Evan's heart shatter for his lover, he just couldn't believe that someone possessed that much evil to do all those things to another living being.

Since that incident two days ago Randy had been very reserved, almost cautious like he was going to make Cody and Evan runaway. They had spent most of the time talking, any touches were soft and very careful as though something was about to break. And Evan didn't like it. He wanted his strong sexy Viper back and he could only hope the man he had came to pick up could fix everything.

The arrivals hall was thankful quite deserted and as Evan bounced on the spot waiting to catch sight of the all too familiar figure. As people started to wander through the door, he was scanning the crowd. Within moments he saw the person he was waiting for. With a grin lighting up his broken face Evan waited then squeaked loudly as large arms enveloped him, lifting him up for a massive bear hug.

"Hey JC," giggled Evan hugging the big man back.

"Hey Squirt!" replied John slowly setting the smaller man down but as he did his smile slowly faded.

Realising what John was staring at, Evan explained quickly, "Its okay. It'll be fine in a few days."

"You've got a broken nose," murmured John the fun and laughter fading from his face leaving him serious.

"Its okay," soothed Evan. He sighed then shrugged saying, "In a way its good thing it happen.." he cut John's protest off saying, "It was him doing this that made his walls shatter. John, if he hadn't we'd still…"

"I know, I know. I just hate the thought of him hitting you like that," sighed John. He shook his head then clapping his hands together he said, "Okay enough sadness. We're not here to reminisce. We're here to move on. So…" he scanned the surround area, "What now, Squirt? What's the plan?"

"Well let's you and I get in the car where it is just us and work everything out," Evan walked with John to collect the older man's bags.

"Ok. Are you sure your nose…" John stopped mid sentence as Evan gave him a look that screamed shut up.

"He could break it a million times if it would fix his problems," Evan confessed.

"I guess we all feel the same about him," John whispered.

Evan looked at John as he picked up his suit case, surprised that John admitted to still having feelings for Randy. This was a great thing for him to hear, as it was something he wanted to learn more about in the car before taking John to Randy.

After getting the bags they walked towards the airport exit, both of them getting stopped occasionally to sign a few things and take a couple pictures, plastering their faces with fake smiles instead of the sombre ones they wanted to wear.

"This is my, well Randy's," Evan stumbled on his words, pointing at Randy's H2 which he had driven to the airport.

"Our ride, got it," John laughed as the doors unlocked, both of them hopping in and Evan starting the ignition.

"So where do I start?" Evan bit his lip.

"Try at the beginning," chuckled John, smiling indulgently at the smaller man.

Evan shook his head then drawing in a deep breath he began, "We were playing the other night. You know Randy is having the house refurbished from top to bottom? Well he had a playroom installed," he ignored the surprised look on John's face keeping his eyes firmly forward, continuing, "We were playing and things started to get hard. Nothing new we've played hard but this time…this time it was different. It was like it wasn't him. It was mean and nasty and…and well one thing lead to another and it ended up with him breaking my nose but that's not the point. The point is once that happened he collapsed, he withdrew and it was then Cody and I discovered the truth about his past. About who had been his master and abused him and …he told us some of the things that happened…and…"

"Hey," breathed John reaching over and gently thumbing away a tear from that had leaked from Evan's eye, "Its okay you don't need to tell me the details. I know some of them I..." John's voice caught in his throat and it took him several moments to collect his voice before he conclude, "I even saw some of it first hand and it was the worst night of my life because I couldn't save him and that's all I wanted to do. I just wanted to grab him and run. But I didn't, I couldn't…I failed him" whispered John the pain and hurt all too evidence in his voice.

"From what Randy told me there was no way for you to win," Evan stopped at some stoplights.

"I was selfish. I picked my career, money over him. I know its what he wanted me to do but I shouldn't have done it," John looked out the window. "I should have called the cops, beat Hunter's skull in with a chain. Something different to stop Randy from going through all of that. Because no one deserves what happen to him, especially him," John's blue eyes turned to meet the chocolate ones of Evan.

"It's ok, its in the past. We're in the now, and now is the time when we can save him and heal his darkened soul," Evan pressed the gas as the light turned green.

"I hope you're right," John sucked on his bottom lip. "How is Cody handling Randy like this?"

"At first, when Randy broke my nose, he was really upset," Evan pouted. "But after Randy started opening up Cody became the one to listen to all the horrifying stories," Evan let one hand drop from the steering wheel. "I just couldn't handle them. We've played and played rough but Randy had things done to him I didn't think were humanly possible. John, how did Randy end up in that situation with Hunter? He won't really mention the first night too much."

"He was tricked," John sighed. "Manipulated."

"Tricked?" murmured Evan his heart racing at just the mere thought of a certain someone preying on the younger Randy, "That's horrible!"

"Yeah," agreed John bitterly, "It sucks but the sad things is that was our business back then...and in some ways its still the business now."

Evan glanced at him then realising what John was implying, he snapped, "It's not like that with us! John, I swear its not."

"I know I know," soothed John, "If it was I wouldn't flown half way around the country when you called me." He reached over and caressing Evan's thigh he added fondly, "I know how much Randy cares about you two guys and you two adore him. No, its very different situation." He gave a loud sigh and rubbing his face, he huffed, "Shit we're getting ourselves into a state and we're not even with Randy yet!"

"Yeah, probably a good thing I bought extra tissues."

John laughed and settling back against the car seat, he turned their conversation away from the threatening gloom and onto lighter subjects asking, "So tell me – what's this I hear about an amazing sunken bath that you boys had fitted. Randy told me it was a real gem of thing."

"It is," grinned Evan sniffling back the unshed tears, "It's gorgeous, you'll have to try it while you're here. Randy loved just wallowing in it with the jets on full blast. He is such a water baby sometimes."

"Water baby?" giggled John, "Oh man don't let Ortz hear you calling him a water baby! That's just priceless."

"Yeah I'd probably get a spanking from that comment," Evan giggled. "I mean that in a fun way," he quickly added thinking John might take it the wrong way.

"Oh he would grump and blush at that," John laughed. "So with your nose I doubt it's a good idea for all of us to go out for dinner so should we get some take out or maybe stop and I'll grab some groceries and the three of us cook Randy something special."

"I like the cooking option, the kitchen was finished last week and we really haven't cooked in it yet," Evan smiled liking John's idea.

"Great," John reached behind his head scratch his neck a bit nervous to ask the next question. "So, are you and Cody both ok if I have one on one time with Randy," John looked at the hummer's driver. "I mean…" Evan held a hand up telling John he didn't need to explain.

"Cody took some convincing to let you have Randy alone for a bit but we are ok with it," Evan put his hand back on the wheel. "I think it would be for the best for you two to start alone and then maybe when Randy is feeling himself we'll join in?"

"Yeah sounds fine, is this free for all or am," again John was cut off by the smaller man.

"We'll go with the flow and stick to what is helping Randy the most," Evan spotted a grocery store. "Will that one do?"

"Perfect," grinned John.

As they wandered around the aisle, Evan pushed the trolley enjoying the rare treat of seeing John Cena being totally domestic. As they got to the dessert counter John paused, hands on hips staring at the treats in front of them. Glancing at Evan he asked, "Which should we get? What do you think Randy will be in the mood for?

Evan took a long look then gave a little chuckle replying, "Honestly – no idea. He's not been himself and to be honest Cody and I worried. He's not eating properly." He sighed and leaning on the trolley he bit his lower lip staring at the sweet goodies in font of him.

Seeing the cloud of sadness settling on the younger man again John reached over and rubbing Evan's shoulder he soothed, "Hey Squirt that's' I'm here for. Okay? We're gonna get Randy back..." he held Evan's eyes staring directly into the soft chocolate eyes before winking and turning back to the counter pondering, "I think a good slice of death by chocolate will do him. What d'ya say?"

"Well he does love his chocolate," replied Evan straightening up, "So yeah good idea…to both idea."

John and Evan made their way to the check out and paid for all the items to make up the surprise dinner for the depressed Viper. Getting back in the car they continued on their way to the half renovated home of Cody, Evan and Randy.

"So do you think when Randy is feeling better we should get rid of his play room so he doesn't relapse?" John asked opening a can of red bull he bought at the store.

"No, I mean, we like playing like that but," Evan stopped at yet another set of stop lights. "Usually before we play Randy, Cody and I sit together and discuss all the toys to be used and the plot for play."

"Oh really," John was surprised.

"Yeah, that was how every other time went but that night was different, so we just need to make sure going forward we have those talks," Evan smiled accelerating as the light turned red.

"Do you really like playing like that?" John just had to double check.

"I do," Evan blushed. "Normally Cody takes most of the hard stuff he really likes it even more than me. I usually bring Randy toys and nuzzle his leg while wearing my outfit. I get a couple rough things but normally it worth it for the end result," Evan smiled thinking of said end result.

"What the end result?" John was curious.

"Well, Randy frees us from whatever we have been chained with and," Evan tried not to crash the car remembering. "He just gets really tender and loving with us, cleaning us, checking us over. Then even if he's dead tired," Evan sighed and said without thinking how this would affect John. "He makes love to us."

"He makes love to you?" asked John slowly, "Both of you?"

"Yeah," blushed Evan realising how much he had actually said.

"Wow," murmured John slumping back against the seat. He stared straight ahead lost within his own thoughts. Thoughts that were tinged with guilt for never having the courage to try and free Randy from his abusive relationship. After a few moments he realised Evan was shooting him furtive glances, the soft chocolate eyes swimming with worry and concern.

Giving a broad grin John soothed, "Its okay Evan. I admit it kind of stings to hear what you guys get up but to be honest…" he looked at the smaller man and confessed, "Its nice to know he takes such good care of you guys...Well normally!" he added with a crocked smirk.

"Yeah," agreed Evan bursting out laughing, "Normally he does, just last time…" his voice faded not really sure what to call it.

"He had an episode," supplied John, "You know I'm surprised he hung on this long before breaking down." He smiled sadly at Evan but then leaning over he griped the firm thigh promising, "But we're gonna fix him. You, me, Cody – the three of us, we're gonna get him through this...I promise."

Evan didn't reply. He just kept driving. As they swung into the drive he killed the engine and as John started to click the seatbelt undone Evan called, "John…" he waited for John to look at him before continue, "I believe you."

The smile that lit John's face was blinding and said more than words ever could.


	2. Chapter 2

Both men stepped out of the car, arms loaded with the items they had bought at the grocery store. Leading John up to the front door, Evan tapped the door bell as he couldn't manage opening the door with all the bags and neither could John.

"About time," Cody smiled as he held open the door ushering John and Evan in. "Wow who is cooking all that? Better not be me or the house will be down in flames," Cody laughed.

"I'm cooking," John reassured the younger man. "Don't worry about it," John followed the two younger men into the kitchen. "Where's Randy?"

"Taking a nap," Cody replied opening the fridge to assist in putting the groceries away. "He hasn't been sleeping well so we'd best leave him for now."

"You finally got him to sleep?" Evan was relived knowing that Randy had been wandering the house at night since the incident.

"Yeah not sure for how long though," Cody gave Evan a hug kissing him on the cheek. John watched the two share a brief embrace, thinking how lucky Randy was to have them.

"Boys, I'm going to start preparing this so that when he does wake up it will be ready for him," John tossed an onion up and caught. "So where do I find a cutting board and a knife?"

Within minutes the kitchen was alive with the sound of cooking and laughter. Cody has been banished to the sink on wash up duty while John and Evan busied themselves preparing the feast. As John prepared the chicken, Evan was preparing some corn at the far end of the kitchen and so was the first to see the door open and a rather surprised Randy appear in the opening.

Smiling Evan dropped the corn and padded over grinning, "Hey you."

Randy gave him a tight smile his eyes glued to the purple bruising marring Evan's face. With his eyes flooding with regret he reached out whispering, "I'm so sorry..."

Evan caught his hand and squeezing it tight gave a warm smile replying softly, "I know and I still love you."

Randy's smile grew a little and as Evan hugged him he glanced over exclaiming, "John?"

"Hey buddy," called John a wide grin on his face, "Surprise!"

"What...I…what are you doing here?"

Evan and Cody both avoided John's gaze, both pointedly looking anywhere but at the older man. He gave a little bark of a laugh and shook his head murmuring, "You little…"

"Someone want to fill me on what's going on?" asked Randy absently snaking an arm around Evan's waist and puling him closer as if more contact would make everything better because suddenly he was scared, really scared and he didn't like that feeling one little bit.

"We told you were going to make everything right," Cody towelled off his hands and walked from the sink to Randy's other side. "That's why John's here."

Randy stood there fidgeting as both Cody and Evan stroked his back while he stared at John. He looked at the floor and frowned, he didn't know what to say because he knew John wasn't there out of friendship but for another reason, an apology. At least that's what he thought.

"I'm…" Randy raised his eyes meeting John's surprisingly smiling blue eyes. Randy closed his eyes hard he just couldn't say the words out, he wasn't strong enough yet not after what he did to his boys. Randy just wanted to be alone to wallow in his self misery. "I can't do this."

Randy pushed away from his boys and stalked off while John, Evan and Cody watched his bathrobe clad body leave the kitchen and go back up stairs.

"Ran…" Cody started but John was beside him and placed a hand over his mouth.

"Let him be," John lowered his hand. "Lets just finish dinner and get him to eat. Baby steps boys that's what we need to take with him."

"I'm still worried about leaving him alone when he's awake," Evan frowned. "He has…" he swallowed hard not what to say, "…things all over the house."

"Things?" asked John puzzled by Evan's murmured comment.

"Knives," Cody replied.

"Knives?" exclaim John rubbing his mouth and chin with his hand.

Letting out a long sigh he drawled, "Okay boys - new plan. I'm gonna go get self-destructo boy and bring him back down, you two carry coo...no wait Evan you carry on cooking, Cody you stay the hell away from the stove, " he gave Cody a fond wink earning an eye roll in return as Evan giggled. Wiping his hands on his jeans John took a deep breath and headed off to find Randy.

Evan watched him go then padding over to Cody he slid his arms around the younger man and resting his head on Cody's shoulder, he asked, "It's gonna be okay isn't? I mean Randy's gonna get better, right?"

"Yeah," replied Cody hugging his small lover, "I think he will." He brushed a kiss into Evan's hair then patting the firm rump he chuckled, "Come on, Teacher's pet - lets get cooking."

John was wandering the large upper floor. It was a mess. Most of the rooms were unfinished and in sates of disarray but as he reached the far door he knocked and pushed it open and smiled. The master bedroom was stunning. It was decorated with exquisite taste but right then the only thing occupying John's attention was the figure slumped on the edge of the bed, long fingers raking over the shorn head, soft growls and whimpers echoing around the room.

Stepping in John closed the door behind him and called softly, "Hey Randy…"

Slowly Randy dropped his hands away from his head then in a voice thick with tears and emotion he rumbled, "Why are you here?"

John shrugged his shoulders and ramming his hands into his pockets, he offered, "Because that's what best friends do. They fly half way across the country to help each other when they need it."

Slowly Randy looked up and with an expression that broke John's heart, he murmured, "You're still my friend? After everything I've done to you, to... to my boys..." Randy's face crumpled even more as he remembered the awful things he's inflicted on his two lovers. He caught John's eye and whispered, "Why? How can you even be in the same room as me after everything I've done?"

"Um not the first time we've hung out or been in the same room since…" John took a deep breath "…that time," he sat on the bed beside Randy throwing his arm over Randy's shoulder. "That wasn't you and I know you had no choice. You were trying to protect me."

"Protect you, John, I… I…" Randy stammered cringing at the violent acts he inflicted on John while Hunter had watched on.

"Shh," John pulled Randy closer letting the shaved head rest on his shoulder. "Wasn't you. It was him. I'm just as bad as you. I didn't save you I gave up."

"You didn't have a choice! It was your job," Randy trembled scared that John would realize he was no good and leave once more.

"I was stupid. You're more important than my job ever should have been to me. After what happen, I won't lie, I was confused. I didn't understand why you stay, took me years to understand everything," John sighed. "When I did figure it out I thought I was too late and I failed you. I gave up," John said the words that were the opposite of his famous catchphrase. "I'm not going to give up this time," John kissed the top of the head. "I'm not and I'm sure Cody and Evan aren't. We're going to help you Randy, and show you that you are love," John tilted Randy's tear streaked face up and kiss the soft lips of the Viper.

John felt Randy begin to melt into the kiss then suddenly he was being pushed away and Randy was standing about a foot away looking shocked beyond belief. Righting himself John cocked his head and drawled, "Ummm something wrong?"

"You kissed me!" exclaimed Randy his eyes far too wide to be normal, "You...I …no no this is a dream...This isn't real...it can't be real. There's no way you'd want to be near me...no this is...God no I..." he started to claw at his head, the blunt nails dragging over his shorn hair, leaving worrying red marks and watching him, broke John's heart into a thousand pieces.

Standing up slowly he stepped closer calling softly, "Randy this isn't dream. I'm here. I'm real. Look..." he caught Randy's' hand and pressed it to his face, "See it's me, stubble and all. Fuck you're a mess Ortz." Without thinking he wrapped his large arm around his long time friend holding him close ignoring the way Randy struggled again him the viper trying to slither out of the unwanted hug.

Finally breaking free Randy stared at him breathing heavily wiping at his mouth with his hands. He frowned then asked gruffly, "Why...why are you here...why did you try and kiss me why..."

"Told ya," replied John calmly, "You're my best friend and it's about time I stepped up and become the friend you need. So why don't you go have shower, get dressed – because seriously you in bathrobe it's damn distracting – then come down stairs and have the dinner that me and the guys have prepared fro you. Okay?"

Randy just nodded and John gave him a firm pat on the back before leaving the room. "Distracting?" Randy murmured shaking his head there was no way after what he had done that John could be attracted to him still or carry feelings like that for him.

Randy rolled his neck and walked over to his dresser, opening the draw staring down at the hundreds of affliction t-shirts he owned. Evan and Cody each had their favorites on him. Evan loved the dark blue on with the cross, while Cody loved the rich bright red one however Randy was not in a colorful mood. Touching the soft fabric he pulled out a black one covered in skeletons and skull which to him reflected his sad tormented mood.

Grabbing underwear and a pair of denim shorts Randy enter the glorious bathroom he had built for his boys. Running his fingers along the marble sink counter top he closed his eyes and remember the night his boys brought him to the completed room. "I never deserved that night," Randy spoke to his reflection in the mirror. A reflection that looked like a shell of the man he was only days ago, gone was the strong powerful Viper, and what he saw was young twenty three year old Randal Keith Orton servant of the three most dominate letters in the WWE, HHH.

"How is he?" asked Evan the moment John reappeared in the kitchen.

"He's a mess," replied John slowly making his way over the cooker.

He started fussing over the chicken not really wanting either of the younger men to see the tears in his eyes. Evan had warned him that Randy was suffering but having seen his best friend so distressed and ripped apart was killing John. Killing him because he knew deep in his heart he could have done something to prevent. If he'd had the courage and the strength of character he could have saved Randy years of abuse and torment but he hadn't. He'd taken the pay off, he'd walked away and abandoned him.

It wasn't until he felt a hand on his arm that he realised Evan was with him. He gave a sad smile and murmur, "I fucked up."

Evan didn't reply, he simply gave a soft smile and stared at him with soft understanding eyes that ripped at John's heart.

He took a deep breath then grinned at the smaller man as he promise, "But I'm here now and we're gonna make it right," he gave Evan a wink earning a wide grin in return as he chuckled, "Come on Squirt, this dinner ain't gonna cook itself."

Ten minutes later, just as they were putting everything in to cook, the kitchen door opened and a very hesitant Randy stepped through. He looked skittish as if any moment he would turn and run but the instant he appear Cody was at his side. Seeing the almost nervous look in Randy's eyes, Cody smiled and murmured, "We've missed you," before pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.

With Cody snuggled against him, Randy glanced nervously at John before letting his eyes linger once again on Evan's broken face. His face fell but before he could speak John said brightly, "Okay dinner is cooking we've got about 1 hour – so what we gonna do while we wait?"

Randy didn't respond he just bowed his head looking at the tiles almost as if awaiting an order from one of the other men. Cody cuddled Randy's side taking in the clean scent of Randy and his aftershave while resting his hand on Randy's chest.

"Come on must be something you want to do beside sulk," Cody smiled and tried to tease Randy. Evan shot Cody a look not thinking it was a go idea to try that tactic on their tattooed lover with how he had been acting the past few days.

"We bought ice cream," John said. "We could have a little dessert before dinner? I mean it's an hour away and we've all got big appetites," John smiled hoping that his suggest would brighten up the gloomy kitchen.

"Yeah we could eat it out by the pool the suns out and it's not scorching hot," Evan went to get bowls and John the ice cream.

"Randy you still like the ice cream with the little Carmel cups right?" John held up the tub of ice cream.

"Yeah," the older man sighed.

"Come on Randy lets go steal the bigger lounger," Cody laughed hugging the older man who final had said something. Cody reached down and grabbed Randy's wrist and realized he felt cloth there. Peaking between his fingers he saw a bandage and his eyes went wide.

Randy looked at him silently begging him not to say anything. Cody just stared back then with a slight wobble in his voice he called, "You're okay with that aren't you guys? If I take Randy outside and we steal the swinger?"

"Yep," called Evan his voice muffled by the fact he was head first in the cupboard, "Why don't you put the light on then we can show John the pool as well."

"Pool?" asked John, "You guys got a pool?"

"Yep," grinned Evan final emerging for the cupboard, "Randy had a massive pool and sun area installed, its perfect for after dinner lounging."

"Sound amazing," murmured John feeling just the slightest pang of jealousy at the life the three men seemed to share.

As John and Evan discussed the pool, Cody gently pulled Randy after him heading towards the deck and pool area Evan loved so much.


	3. Chapter 3

Sinking onto the swinger seat Randy looked at the ground waiting for Cody to explode at him. He'd be stupid he knew that. Cutting never solved anything but it had felt good. For a few brief second it had felt so good. But now he was about to pay the price. He closed his eyes waiting for the dressing down. But nothing happened. He felt the swing shift and felt Cody settled down beside him. He felt the familiar weight of Cody snuggled against him and then a firm hand taking his, entwining their fingers.

Cody's fingers touched the bandage softly. Looking at Randy with sorrowful eyes he leaned up to kiss the older man. Randy pulled Cody on to his lap deepening the kiss and shuddered almost crying at the kindness he was being given. Pulling back Randy and Cody just looked into each other's eyes.

"It's ok Randy," Cody looked down at the bandage. "What did you use?"

"My razor," Randy whispered feeling ashamed.

"Did you wash and put ointment on it before the bandage," Cody caressed the older man's clean shaven face.

"Yes," Randy looked over at the pool. "They'll growl at me when they see it."

"No they won't," Cody snuggled Randy more and Randy kicked one foot making the swing rock. "We want you to understand - it's ok to hurt. We just want to help you cope with these demons."

"Oh Cody, you have no idea the things I feel," Randy closed his eyes trying to suppress the dark memories of his past. "What happen, god what I wanted to do. Those things were worse than anything that happen to me," Randy choked back a sob.

"But you didn't you fought that urge," Cody stroked Randy's head and heard the patio doors open. "Be strong for Evan please," Cody kissed Randy's temple.

Randy frowned and as Cody pulled back he asked, "Strong for...what do you mean?"

Cody glanced towards Evan who was chatting happily with John each of them carrying two bowls heading towards the sun deck and sighed. Without looking at Randy he replied, "He loves you so much but he's so scared right no..."

"I'm not surprised!" snarled Randy bitterly, "I broke his fucking nose! I'm amazed he can bear to be in the same..."

"No!" exclaimed Cody, "No Randy he's not scared OF you, he's scared FOR you." He searched Randy's eyes seeing the confusion and pain and sighed again. Slipping off Randy's lap, he settled down next to him and murmured, "Please …"

"Here we go," called John brightly as he stepped up onto the desk, "Ice cream with toffee crunch and strawberry sauce. Just the way you like Ortz." He gave a low appreciative whistle and glancing around he chuckled, "Man you've got a beautiful pace here guys. Oh you know you should hold the next locker room party."

"No way!" exclaimed Evan, "There is no way I'm letting that rabble loose in here. "

He'd been watching John and so hadn't noticed the arm reaching out to take the ice cream from him. It wasn't until he looked down to make sure Randy had hold of the bowl that he finally noticed the banged on Randy's writ. With a soft "Oh my god," he stared at the white material before slowly lifting his eyes and asking hoarsely, "What the fuck did you do to yourself?"

Randy jerked his hand away cradling it with his other hand avoiding Evan's eyes. "Don't worry about it," Randy whispered when he wanted a growl. Evan knew what it was now and he felt at fault like he should have went up stairs with Randy and stayed at his side.

John saw the bandage too but said nothing. He just walked over and handed Cody his ice cream, ordering "Eat up, it's going to melt," and with that he started eating his.

Evan pulled up a chair in front of the swing, they all ate in relative silence which was not what they needed right now. Cody and John glanced at each other and Cody saw John give him a quick wink before taking a finger full of ice cream and swiping it down Randy's nose.

"What the…" Randy jumped startled at the touch.

Cody quickly followed up John's action by cupping Randy's face and licking the melted treat off Randy's nose.

"You know I'm having revenge," Randy laughed playfully for the first time since the incident.

Evan saw Randy's smile this was what the older man needed and not for him to point out what he had done wrong. "Randy, it's three on one we're going to win," Evan hopped out of his chair and climbed onto Randy's lap the swing creaking in protest.

Randy groaned with the combined attack but for once he had never been so happy to be outnumbered in his life. Cody was pressed into his side laughing loudly. John was kneeling in front of him, attacking his knees but it was Evan he was happiest to feel attacking him. Evan, his small yet fierce lover, laughing out loud as he concentrated his fight back on him. Dipping Evan backwards Randy all but dangled him off the swing growling playfully, "Not fair, Puppy. That was a sneak attack!"

Evan didn't respond he was squealing with laughter flicking bits of ice cream at Randy, one hand curled tightly around Randy's bicep to stop himself falling. With a soft grunt of effort Randy up righted him pulling him in tight. Breathing heavily with the exertion of the fight Randy absently nuzzled his face into the soft brown hair and whispered, "Forgive me for being stupid?"

Evan hesitated then seeing both John and Cody watching him, both of them waiting to see what his answer would be, he turned in Randy gasped and running a finger along Randy's jaw line he sighed, "I hate it when you..." he saw Randy's eyes flood with emotion and added quickly "...but yes. Always. I just wish…" he sighed again not knowing how to say what he wanted. So he did the only thing he could think. He pressed his lips to Randy and began kissing him.

Randy just held Evan on his lap kissing him. He knew cutting himself had upset the young man in his arms greatly. But this kiss was Evan's way of giving him forgiveness for the act and Randy was grateful yet still confused why his boys and John were going out of their way to help him.

Pulling back from the kiss Evan giggled, "I don't think this swing likes all of us on it."

"Yeah," Cody agreed hearing the chains creak.

"How about we go inside and check dinner?" John stretched and stood up from the swing. "But it's really nice I think we should eat dinner out here by the pool."

"I like that idea," Evan hopped off Randy's lap and started John inside to the kitchen.

"Let's go in Randy," Cody gave a small kiss to Randy's cheek taking his hand and getting him to stand. Randy walked back into the house.

"Anything I can do to help?" Randy looked at John and Evan who were busy fussing over pots.

"No we're good, beside you need rest," Evan opened the fridge looking for something.

"I don't need rest," Randy grumbled just wanting something to keep his mind occupied.

Evan could barely stop himself laughing when he glanced over and saw the world class pout marring Randy's face. With a soft shake of the head he called," Well if you really want to help…"

"I do!" growled Randy far too quickly.

"You could come and give me a hug," finished Evan looking at Randy with the biggest puppy eyes ever.

Randy hesitated then slowly closed the gap between them. Wrapping his arms around Evan's shoulders he hugged his small lover burying his face in the soft dark hair. Evan returned the hug with interest, looking over at Cody who was grinning at him, happy to see Randy comfortable again at touching them. John watched on a sad smile tugging his lips. As Randy pulled back Evan added cheekily, "And I'm sure John wouldn't say no to hug either."

Randy glanced down at Evan frowning suddenly not certain about things again. Seeing the hesitation Evan slid his hand into Randy's and whispered, "Go on, go hug him he won't run away."

Randy gulped then stepping away from Evan he looked at John who was watching him uncertainly. With a quick glance at Cody – who nodded giving Randy a fond wink at the same time – Randy slowly stalked over towards John. He stopped just short of his long time best friend and just stared at him frozen to the spot uncertain how to go about hugging John.

Randy stood in front of John uncomfortable while John looked at him with a soft smile. "You don't have to," John whispered not a hint of hurt in his words. John knew Randy emotions and mind were waging an inner batter, so he knew this could be too much too soon for the tattooed man.

"No," Randy stepped into John putting his arms around John's neck. "I'm sorry," Randy whispered as he felt John's hands on his back stroking it soothingly.

"I'm sorry too," John returned the apology. Cody and Evan watched the hug it started a bit awkward but became more relaxed and intimate as time passed. Both young men smiling and amazed at how Randy was acting submissive to John, they had only ever seen Randy as a leader, strong and dominate.

But this was why John was here and they knew it. John could cuddle Randy and be his support where they really couldn't. Randy wouldn't lean on them because the older man felt it was his job and duty to look after them.

More minutes passed Randy was resting his head on John's shoulder his eyes closed looking like he was finding peace in John's arms. Slowly the grey eyes opened and Randy leaned up to kiss John.

John smiled and very slowly he leant forward pressing his lips against Randy's. It was a strangely chaste kiss, almost platonic in its simplicity but as Randy pulled back a soft smile curling his lips he looked at John and whispered, "I mean it."

"I know," replied John a grin splitting his face. He searched Randy's face but before he could do anything a pot started to boil and both he and Evan dived forward attempting to rescue the momentarily forgotten dinner. Randy stood watching them for a moment amazed at how well the two men worked together. He jumped as he felt a hand on his elbow and turning he found himself drowning in soft blue eyes that were smiling at him.

"Come on," said Cody pulling him out of the way of the two cook, "Why don't we set the table and get the drinks sorted. Leave those two to work their magic alone."

Randy nodded grunting as Cody thrust the cutlery tray into his arms. As he trailed after Cody towards the back door he glanced back and saw John watching him. As their eyes locked John shot him a wink and mouthed, "Missed you."

Randy took the plates form the cupboard while Cody retrieved the silver ware there was a happy aura in the kitchen like everything would be ok. Even Randy could feel it inside but was still fighting his demons what if he snapped again with his boys after John left because John wouldn't stay forever would he.

That kiss was nothing but friendship but Randy in that soft moment he remembered that night, the night Hunter found him and John in bed. It was a night Randy held in his heart, he and John tangled in the hotel sheets making love when Randy knew he could get in so much trouble but Hunter was away that night and would never know. Or that's what he thought but that was the night that destroy his soul.

Randy shook the rest of the memory just remembering John holding him and kissing and not the aftermath of when Hunter had kicked in the hotel room door.

"Earth to Randy," Cody waved his hand in front of Randy's face.

"Sorry baby," Randy gave a soft smile placing the last plate on the table.

"Did you want some water or pop?" Cody offered. "I was going to get a drink."

"Water, thanks," Randy turned and watched Cody go back into the kitchen. "If they left me would I kick a door in?"

He knew the answer almost instantly. He would die for his boys but if they ever asked to leave if they ever found someone they loved he'd never stand in their way. He loved them too much to see them suffer the way he suffered at Hunter's hands. He'd loved John so much and he'd had to hurt destroy and betray him. He closed his eyes fighting back the tears as he remembered John's face that night. The sheer horror and disgust that had filled those blue eyes.

Randy gripped the edge of the seat he was leaning against and whispered, "No...I'll never do that. I won't be like him."

Then from nowhere he heard that growling mocking voice whispering, "Then you are nothing but a failure. Did I teach you nothing, you are their master. You are their world. They owe everything to you."

"NO!" screamed Randy, "No. No I won't do that. I wont I..."

"Randy?"

He spun around found John standing behind him arms landed with food, staring at him not with revulsion and horror as that night but with soft understanding. Setting the food down John just reached over and dragged Randy into his arms and hugged him silently cheering when Randy flowed into his embraced the strong arms wrapping a around his waist as Randy started to cry sobbing into the crook of his neck finally letting going of some of the guilt and shame that he had been carrying around for so many years.

John swayed back and forth letting Randy cry his only wish right now was for Cody and Evan to stay in the kitchen. It would hurt Randy's pride and psyche for them to see him like this. "It's ok," John rubbed Randy's stubby head. "He can't hurt us anymore, we can hurt him," John wondered if he had chosen the right words.

"We can't hurt him John," Randy pulled back from the hug. "He'll destroy us."

"What fire us? We've made more money between us that most guys make in a lifetime," John smiled. "Do you know what kind of blow it would be now for us to leave? Or the fact he can't hurt us creatively because we are the damn show," John pressed his forehead to Randy's. "Can't see us, he can't touch us."

"John, you only saw a piece of what he can do," Randy blinked hot tears running down his face. "You really don't know he's got friends in high places, and he's got friends in the lowest."

"I won't let him touch you again," John's tone was dead serious.

"You can't stop him John," Randy pushed the large man away. "Do you know when the last time he had me was? Do you?" John didn't say anything wanting to grab Randy back into the hug. "Months," Randy's voice trailed off. "But every time I go to a show he leaves me reminders than anywhere, any place when he wants I will be on my knees like a dog for the king of kings," Randy choked. "Because if I don't it's not you he uses against me anymore, it's Evan and Cody," John and Randy's heads swung as a dish shattered on the floor and there in the door way was the two names Randy had just said.

John swore under his breath as he felt Randy start to shake beside him. Rubbing Randy's back he soothed, "Its okay, maybe they didn't hear." He looked past Randy at the guys standing in the doorway and forcing his voice to sound normal, he called, "You okay guys? What happened?"

There was a moment's hesitation and John could see both younger men struggling to reign in their emotions. It was Evan who finally answered, his voice unnaturally tight as he called, "We umm we just we bump each other that's all I...I'll…" he swore loudly then without finishing speaking he turned and vanished aback into the kitchen. Cody seemed frozen to the spot staring at Randy his blue eyes wider than natural.

Slowly Randy pulled away and John could see the mask slipping back into place. Randy gave him a tight smile then as he glanced around he saw Cody staring at him. He drew in a deep breath then frowned asking, "Where's Evan?


	4. Chapter 4

Cody shook his head – he hadn't noticed Evan was no longer with him - then jumped when he heard a scream of rage echo through the house. Turning he started running, hearing towards the source of the noise. Taking the steps that led down to the basement two at a time he skidded round the corner and stopped dead in his track. Because there, in the underground practice room, Evan was using the punch bag, screaming the top of his voice as each punch landed don the bag.

"Wow," drawled John as he slowed to halt beside Cody, "I don't think I've seen him loose it like that!"

"Not a lot of people have," explained Cody, "But when Puppy gets mad," he looked at John and with almost paternal pride he grinned, "Puppy gets mad."

They watch Evan land a round house kick on the bag, Randy standing a few feet behind them, regretting what he had said. He had only wanted John to know the truth he had never meant the boys to over hear him and he certainly never meant to upset Evan the way he had. He just kept failing and upsetting Evan and Cody. Maybe if I just left thought Randy, and return to being single then Hunter will leave them alone and I won't hurt them.

Randy slinked away quietly passing through the kitchen on his way upstairs. But as he passed the kitchen he saw the meal prepared for him and stopped. "All this for me," Randy looked at the chicken, potatoes, all the fixings more than what they should have spent their time one.

Randy shook his head and decided to the right thing and returned to the basement gym. No one had moved except Evan would was now panting after his vicious attack on the punching bag. "Guys, dinner is getting cold," Randy felt his voice crack and his words came out timid like a mouse.

All three men looked at Randy who felt like running away again. "Good point let's eat boys," John smiled walking over to Randy. Taking his head he started to lead him towards the stairs only to stop. "Wait what's this room?" John saw an ajar door.

"John no," Cody slammed the door shut.

"It's the play room," Randy jerked his hand away from John and ran upstairs.

Cody glared at John then barked "Nice going!"

"Hey!" snapped John, "I didn't know what it was I was just...just try'na…fuck!" he bowed his head and swore again under his breath.

Behind him Evan gave a soft tut then pushing past the other two he headed up the stairs. He found Randy sitting on the steps leading to the upper floors. The long arms were wrapped around his knees his head resting on his thighs, it was clear Randy was sobbing. The defined shoulders were shaking slightly and the sight just broke Evan's heart. Without speaking he just padded over and sank down on the step below Randy. Resting his head against Randy's thigh he reached up and touched the clasped hands.

Slowly Randy looked up, his face far too pale and streaked once again with tears.

Evan smiled at him faintly then brushing a kiss onto Randy's thigh he murmured, "Why'dya run?"

"Because I hate the idea of John seeing what I created down there. I don't want him knowing…."

Evan twisted round and cupping Randy's face he murmured, "Randy you gotta stop worrying. John loves you, you're his best friend. Randy he flew half way across the country just to be with you. You gotta stop running from him. From us." He leant close resting his forehead against Randy's and added desperately, "Please."

"I'm trying but," Randy sobbed. "It's so hard."

"Come on, let's eat get some food on your belly and then we can show John the room. We'll confront the fear together," Evan pulled Randy up off the stairs and led him to the dining room. "You sit I'll get the food."

Within minutes Evan was back with John, and Cody and their meal. They ate in silence no-one really knowing what to say to strike up a proper and happy conversation with the unstable Viper. Randy ate small bites of his meal but it was obvious he was forcing it to keep the others worrying. He'd take a mouthful and spent a few moments pushing the food on his plate, it wasn't that the food was delicious because it was. It just stomach was upset and he had lost the desire to eat since that night.

"Randy," John smiled. "If you're full don't force it down, you know leftovers make for awesome late night snacks."

Randy put his fork down on his plate, glad he did have to force eat or act like he was. Cody and Evan pouted slightly but not enough for Randy to see, they wanted him eating they knew how little the tattooed man had eaten the past few days.

Cody huffed loudly then yelped as Evan kicked him under the table. Shaking his head Evan signalled for Cody to hold his tongue. He knew the younger man was on the verge of screaming at the Viper to eat something. They both were. Evan knew for a fact Randy had barely had enough food to make one meal in the last three days but even so he knew too that John was right. Shouting or forcing Randy to eat right now would be counterproductive so instead he took a final mouthful of his own dinner and called, "John, Randy wants to show you something after dinner."

"Really?" asked John a happy grin breaking out over his face," What you gonna show me, Ortz?"

Randy was glaring at Evan for the first time in ages some actually fire showing in his eyes. But the moment Evan turned and held his gaze the fire died and Randy bowed his head mumbling, "Just want to...I..." his voice cracked and he couldn't speak. Evan sighed and reached over. Laying his hand on Randy's' arm he gave it a gentle squeezed. It was a silent act of reassurance that did Randy the world of good.

"He wants to show you the play room," explained Evan, "We both do." Seeing John's frown and Cody's mouth opening Evan continued, "We need to chase away the demons from that night." He looked up and fixing his gaze on john he added, "And we need you to help us."

John took a deep breath, "Well alright," John put his fork down having lost his appetite. "Ready when all of you are."

Cody wiped his mouth and pushed his chair back, "Let's go."

The four of them first cleared the table rinsing plates and placing all the dishes into the dish washer trying to buy time before heading to the play room. Once they were out of busy work they had no choice and were back at the playroom door.

Evan slowly opened the door and they all waked in, Randy being the last to enter, trembling that his dark side might re awaken. Nothing was said as John survey the room, since that night none of them had been in the room the toys, weapons, and blood stains all remained where they had been fallen.

"Nice cross," John said taking in the saint Andrews cross before seeing the over sized dildo lying on the floor behind it. "Was this forced…"

"No," Cody quickly said striding over to pick up the toy, once it was in hand he looked at Randy. "I might beg "Oh no master don't" but this is something I have no problem taking, we use this one a lot," Cody explained.

"Ok, I need you guys to tell me what happen before your little role play went wrong," John walked across the room spying the big leather arm chair and decided to take a seat in it. "Please," John requested but was startled as was the boys when Randy went to the chair and kneeled by John's feet like a servant.

Cody and Evan were stunned they had never seen Randy act so subservient in their lives. John too looked shocked and as Randy bowed his head John murmured, "Shit Ortz man what ya doing?"

"Atoning," replied Randy softly. He slowly raised his head and looking at John with tear filled eyes he murmured, "I spent so many nights kneeling for him when all I wanted…" his voice cracked and he gave a strangled half sob.

John gulped then realising it was the chair that was causing the trouble, he slipped out of it kneeing in front of Randy. Cupping his best friend's face John soothed, "Randy, Ortz this is not about whose boss or any of that shit! This about you. About you facing up to what happened three nights ago," he searched Randy's face then swearing softly he leant, in rested his forehead against Randy's' as he breathed, "Tell me what happened."

Randy didn't reply at first. Pulling back he broke John's tender touch before sinking back onto his heels. Looking over his shoulder he stared at Cody and Evan who were standing a few feet away. He looked at them, at his beautiful trusting lovers before looking back at John. Running a hand over his shorn head he murmured, "I broke the rules."

John frowned but before he could ask what Randy meant the broken man murmured, "I broke all the rules. I ignored the safe words, I didn't look at what was happening, I…" he screwed his eyes shut as he growled, "I forced them. I…" he raked his hands over his face before snarling viciously, "I cut and abused my gorgeous Baby and I beat and whipped and raped my beautiful Puppy. I …"

"What the fuck do you mean?" growled John his hand lashing out to grab Randy's face. Holding the struggling man in place John got really close hissing, "Rape? What the fuck do you mean you raped him?"

"I just…" Randy started sobbing.

"Randy you didn't rape me," Evan stood with Cody. "I wanted that sex, that wasn't rape in fact it was great."

"No I…" Randy was breaking down again.

"No!" Evan walked over to Randy and John and knelt down. "John he didn't, he's never done that to either of us."

John wasn't sure about what Evan was say. Randy had punched and shattered Evan's face in rage, so what was to stop him from holding down Evan and fucking the life out of him. John looked into the brown eyes and saw the honesty burning in them making it harder not to believe Evan.

"He didn't John," Cody joined them by Randy. "The rage came when he tried to get Evan to lick blood off my body. Evan doesn't like blood play and it just was too much him. Randy was playing master and really, licking blood isn't dangerous and I think it upset him that Evan wouldn't do something like that and it just snapped him into a dark place," Cody explained.

Randy looked over at Cody and moved to him curling up in his lap like a giant kitten. "Thank you."

Cody smiled sadly at him absently stroking Randy's shorn head. Looking across at John he said, "John I mean it Randy...it was hard, it was really hard play but he would never rape either of us. Never."

John didn't reply. He was watching the three other men, watching the way Randy clung to Cody, the way the grey eyes were glued to Evan and the way the smaller man was smiling fondly at Randy, his hand resting on Randy's shoulder. As John watched he knew the boys were telling the truth. Despite everything that had happened Randy hadn't raped them and certainly not raped Evan.

Sinking down to sit cross legged by Evan, John reached over and caressing Randy's exposed ankle he asked softly, "So what did happen? Tell me exactly. Walk me through what you did in here."

Evan went to open his mouth but John shook his head soothing, "No Squirt, Randy has to do this. They are his demons. He needs to look at me and tell me exactly what he did in here."

"Okay," Randy swallowed drawing his courage. "When I came home from the tour the boys were out. The contactors had be instructed to finish this room next, and when I checked to see the progress," Randy inhaled. "I found the room complete and the urge to roleplay master and slave stirred in me."

"You're doing great, Ortz," John continued to rub the foot and ankle. "None of us are going to get upset at you. I just want to understand better your version of what happened and how you felt."

"I felt fine at that point. I was happy and excited," Randy sighed remembering how good the night started. "I just wanted to torment my boys a little, to push the boys to exhaustion with sexual tortures. I planned on carrying each one upstairs individually when I was done and giving them a nice soapy bath."

John listened to what Randy had originally plan and remembered what Evan told him earlier. Randy's story was matching how Evan had described it to him, how it normally when down when they master, slaved played. "Then you would make love to each of them?" John let the words slip.

"Uh," Randy looked up at John and blinked. "Yes, how did you know?"

"Evan told me what normally happens, how you normally take such good care of them," replied John softly. He smiled, almost sadly, urging," Go on what happened after that?"

"The boys came home and we started playing. I didn't tell them what I wanted," murmured Randy a small frown starting to crease his forehead, "I did...we didn't talk like normal I just…I just went straight into it. I remember Evan being scared, being very reluctant and that annoyed me. For some reason I wanted to hurt them..." he stumbled over his words, gasping for breath as he tried to calm down.

It took a few moments of deep breathing and Cody stroking his head before Randy spoke again, "I wanted total obedience. I wanted them to break to just..."

Randy was staring to get distressed. Tears were pooling in his eyes again as he remember what he had done to the boys. He buried his face in Cody's thigh murmuring, "Cody was trying to sooth him and that made me angry. I attached Cody to the cross and then I just started to get angry. Everything they did, even when they obeyed me, made me angry, furious. I remember dragging Evan to the chair. I remember throwing him over the arm and then I…" Suddenly his head shot up and he stared at Evan gasping, "I whipped you and then I fucked you ...I fucked you so hard you were bleeding…"

"Randy calm down," Evan scooted closer. "You just didn't know your own strength you let me rest when you were done you.."

"No, I didn't," Randy sobbed. "When I was done I started in with the blood play to Cody," Randy was shuddering.

"Blood play?" John shot a look to Cody since that was who it was inflicted upon.

"Just small cuts to bring out blood. We do it a lot, even when we're not play. It's something we find intimate," Cody stroked Randy's head. "Right, Randy? We do it a lot, we both like it because you've let me cut you before too, so it was ok."

"Wait you've cut him?" John was a little confused.

"Yes," Cody admitted with no hesitation in his voice. "It's something he and I do when Evan isn't around. It's hard to explain but we get a rush off it."

"But this time I tried to get Evan to play," Randy's voice choked. "Not to cut him but to get Cody's blood on him so I could lick it off and he resisted me…and then."

John nodded, he got what Randy was trying to say, it was when Evan resisted the blood play he had snapped and punched Evan in the face. "Randy when you lost control was there anything going on in your mind?"

"I could hear his voice, John. I could hear him taunting me to do it," Randy just hid his face in shame.

John sighed and bowing his head he ran a hand over his short hair breathing, "Like he did the night he ordered you to attack me."


	5. Chapter 5

Randy whimpered at John words, borrowing his face deeper into Cody's lap. John closed his eyes and swore under his breath, cursing Hunter with every bad wish he could think off. He jumped when he felt a hand touch his arm. Opening his eyes he found himself drowning in a sea of soft dark chocolate. He gave a bitter smile explaining, "The night Hunter discovered me and Randy, he stood over Randy instructing him what to do. How to hurt me how to…"

John's voice wobbled and he had to take several deep breaths before he could continue, "He just stood there, gloating as Randy broke me apart emotionally." He gave a lopsided sided smile, confessing, "You know I can't even remember what you two did to me physically, I just know my body ached for days but I honestly can't remember. All I can remember was the look in your eyes, the sheer pain, the desperation and I...I walked away for you. I took the blood money and my career and I walked..."

"You had to!" growled Randy slowly uncurling from Cody's lap, "John, you had no choice! He'd have destroyed you, your career..."

"I let you suffer!" exclaimed John, his voice slipping into the voice he used in the ring but this time he wasn't reading a script. This time he meant it. Every single syllable of it rang with heart felt truth, "I walked away, Randy. When I should turned around and stood by you - I walked away. That makes me no better than him. And even worse, when I knew what he was doing to you I didn't lift finger to help you. They call me a good guy and superhero. I'm not. I'm a coward and I am so sorry. I mean that - I am..."

He gasped falling backwards as Randy launched himself at him. Landing heavily John bought his hands up expecting a volley of fits to start landing on him but instead Randy was smiling at him, a strange almost soft smile curling the normally pouting lips. Stroking the side of John face, Randy whispered, "There's nothing to forgive."

And then before John could react Randy was kissing the life out of him.

John was momentarily stunned by Randy's loving assault. Slowly he relaxed into Randy's kiss, for the first time in years feeling those emotions that he had the night he and Randy had been caught in bed together by Hunter. John remember them laughing, kissing almost like this, their tongues stroking one another's gently.

John began stroking Randy's back, one hand resting on the small of his back, the other up on the tattooed shoulders. For this moment in time it was just them, like they had gone back in time. Cody and Evan looked on not wanting to disrupt this moment for the two older men. Seeing Randy happy like this was they're goal and they were not about to spoil his happiness.

Randy and John broke the kiss just looking at each other before Randy turned his head to look at Cody and Evan blushing. "Sorry boys, I got carried away," Randy did nothing however to move off John.

"We don't mind Randy," Evan smiled while Cody nodded.

"I think you two need a little alone time," Cody grinned. "Why don't you take John up to the bed room for a little reconnecting and Evan and I will wait until you're ready for us to join in," Cody winked.

"John, do you want to?" Randy looked at the man beneath him waiting for an answer.

John didn't reply at first. He was staring at Randy his eyes linger on the elegant face hovering above him. Licking his lips still tasting the kisses Randy had peppered him with he murmured, "Why move? I'm comfy here. How about you, Ortz?"

Randy's head snapped back round and he stared down at John, every emotion under the sun flashing across his face in a mere second. Then as John rubbed soothing circles on his lower back he realised what John was suggesting. Slowly he nodded not trusting his voice.

Cody frowned and was about to open his mouth when Evan simply stood up calling, "We'll be outside. Take your time there's no rush." He held his hand out helping Cody to his feet. Giving his younger lover a soft smile Evan looked down at the two older men and smiled fondly asking, "John take care of him, won't you?"

John nodded understanding all too well what the small man was asking. As they boys left John felt Randy tense and the mood darken again. Reaching up to cup Randy's face he soothed, "Hey Ortz look at me…" as Randy slowly obeyed John smiled at him and breathed, "God I've waited for this moment for so long."

"I know, but here with all the…" Randy felt John's hands on his hips.

"You're nervous because of this?" John saw past Randy and the cross, "This room wasn't exactly the most romantic of places. Randy, if you and I can do it here, you'll have won," he stroked Randy's face. "We're not going to use any of it. It's just you and me and what should have been."

"You're right. But this is wrong," Randy said and then added a smirk rolling them so John was on top of him. "Now it's right."

John rested on his arms and looked down at Randy smiling. "Waited so long for this I don't even know where I want to start," John brushed his lips over Randy's cheek.

"Undress me John," Randy whispered letting his hands run up and down the strongly muscled arms of John.

"Not yet," the older man lowered down burying his head into the crook of Randy's neck. The tattooed man moaning as soft kisses trailed up his neck and around the shell of his ear. "I want you completely relaxed," John's hot breath ghosted over Randy's ear.

"John," Randy turned his head to look into the soft loving blue eyes he remember from years gone by. "Make it right."

"I plan to," promised John.

He kissed and nuzzled his way around Randy's neck spending an age worshiping the base of Randy's neck his tongue lapping at the hot skin making Randy purr deep in his throat. Randy tried to move but John simply chuckle and held him still with his body ordering softly, "No, stay still, let me do the work."

Randy whimpered his eyes fluttering shut as John started to move the line of kisses around slowly coming up soft lips brushing his own.

"Kiss me," breathed Randy not caring how desperate he sounded. Right then nothing matter except the greek god currently worshiping him.

John obeyed indulging Randy with the softest most loving kiss he could create. Pulling back with a sigh, John looked down and smiled. He couldn't remember ever having seen Randy look more beautiful that he did in that moment. Reaching over he brushed the back of his index finger of Randy's cheek bone trailing it down to trace Randy's lower lip. Grinning at his best friend John asked softly, "Do you trust me?"

Randy nodded without hesitation.

"Then turn over," ordered john Softly, "Turn over and let help you totally relax."

Randy rolled over and John pushed up the black affliction shirt his wore exposing Randy's lower back but not his tattooed shoulders. John let the tips of his fingers go down the middle of the expose back tracing along the edge of Randy's jeans. Placing both large hands on Randy's hips he let his thumbs press and rub the stress tense muscles.

"Do you want my shirt off," Randy glanced over his shoulder seeing John entranced in the act of massage. The hand gliding now up off the vipers hips to kneed right about his tail bone.

"Not yet," John moved his hands apart and slid them down Randy's sides.

"Most start at the top," Randy curled his arms under his head for support.

"I know but I want to save the best for last," John lend down and kissed Randy's neck letting his tongue flick over one of the black lines of ink that was on his neck. "Do you know how long I've wanted nothing more to trace and lick that tattoo on your back," John seductively whispered. "Every time you take your shirt off in the locker room and I'd see more work done, god I want to take you in the shower and touch it," John began inching Randy's shirt up and Randy lifted and helping to remove it give John his prize.

"Touch it, touch me," Randy lay back on the thick carpet.

John wetted his lips, his hands hovering just above Randy's shoulders. He hadn't been lying he really had been longing for this for years. With a soft low breath he finally let his hands touch his prize, watching as his fingers slid along the dark lines he smiled slightly when Randy gave a low purr, the tattooed man shifting slightly under him his head moving just enough to give John access to the collar bone dents currently hidden from view.

Bending down John pressed his lips to the back of Randy's' neck and whispered," I'm gonna make you feel so good."

"You already are," breathed Randy his voice thick with emotion.

John smiled against the warm skin then taking his time he started to massage the sloping shoulders, his hands working slowly and carefully massaging away each knot of tension that eh came across. Beneath him Randy was starting to purr loudly his whole body reacting the massage. John smiled then after a few minutes he bent down and began kissing his way along the neck tattoo he had yearned after for so long. At each intricate curve his tongue flicked out lapping at the thick line, tracing it fully before he resumed the line of kisses. Absently his hands slid back down Randy's body, caressing his ribs and sides, loving the way Randy reacted to his touch arching like a cat beneath him.

Randy felt John's hands roam his back it was the most wonderful thing. All those nights he spent with Hunter after he did what he did to John all he dream of was John forgiving him. It was a dream that took years but over time they had been able to renew their friendship and it was all Randy had hoped.

But at this moment in time Randy wildest fantasy was occurring not only was his best friend with him, he was loving him and wanting him. He felt John's finger tips run over the links of ink enjoy the thoughts of John wanting to touch his used body like this.

"John," Randy moaned.

"Yeah?" John didn't cease his ministrations he just kept exploring.

"Is there anywhere else you want to touch me?" Randy took a deep breath and hoped.

"Only if you want me to," John kissed the back of Randy's neck.

"I want you to tell me where," Randy sighed awaiting his answer.

"I want…" John moved his lips to Randy's ears. "…to feel you on the inside, taste your most intimate place," John nipped at the shell of Randy's ear. Randy groaned and lifted his hips up rubbing his has against John's crotch offering himself.

John groaned loudly, swearing under his breath as Randy rubs his arse against him. Burying his face into the crook of Randy's neck, he breathed, "Fuck you keep doing that and you'll make me explode baby."

Randy smiled not daring to trust his voice feel tears pricks his eyes again. But not the tears that had been haunting for the last few days, not the tears of humiliation and anger and regret. These were tears of joy, they were tears of sheer unadulterated joy, the pleasure that John wasn't lost to him that there was hope that maybe just maybe what he'd dreamed off all those years ago was still possible. That John might actually love him.

"Randy?"

Randy jumped. He hadn't realised John was talking to him, he hadn't even realised John was no longer grinding against him but instead was sitting back starting at him in worry.

"Ortz, you in there man?" asked John absently stroking Randy's face, thumbing away the single tear that had escaped from Randy's eye.

"I'm sorry..." began Randy his voice cracking with emotion.

"Shhh," soothed John smiling indulgently understating instantly what was wrong. Shifting off Randy he asked softly, "Turn over for me?"

Randy obeyed flopping over onto his back automatically spreading his legs – jut as he had so many times for Hunter. He froze as he realised what he did but then to his utter delight John just slid in between his legs. With a broad grin John simply reached down and lifted Randy up, cradling him and encouraging Randy to wrap his legs around him. So Randy ended up straddling John's lap, wrapped within the strong embrace staring into the laughing blue eyes he had so often dreamt of.

"John," Randy shivered slightly his nerves still not all there.

"It's ok. I've got you. It's only us right now," John kissed Randy's cheek waiting for Randy's hands to start touching him. Randy steady his breathing and let his hands explore John's back.

"I wish he never found us that night," Randy rested his head in the crook John's shoulder. "I always wondered what might have been if we'd actually, well you know."

"I think things might have been different or what happen may have still happen at a later time," John caressed Randy's bottom. "May I?"

"Yes," Randy guided John's hand to his mouth and started sucking on two fingers.

"You know how I feel about you," John held his fingers in Randy mouth. "You are the person who hurts me the most in life you know. You don't do it intentionally because you had no idea how I felt. But once I realized why you did what you did that night was for my safety I've always waited for you to come back to me," John pulled his fingers out of Randy's mouth.

"John, I'm," Randy felt John's hands cup his face.

"You're not allowed to be sorry for finding love and happiness with those two," John brushed his lips over Randy's pouting ones. "It broke my heart but I knew you were happy and free. All I ask is that I can be here too with you."

"Yes," Randy took John's hand with the wetted fingers and brought them down to his entrance. "Stay, touch me."

John gave a strange smile and without talking gently ran his fingers over Randy's entrance. Randy hissed in anticipation whispering, "Please…please touch me, John..."

John didn't answer. He had lowered his eyes hiding the soft blue from Randy and it worried Randy. Suddenly all the uncertainly the fears and swirling emotions started to rise up again and he asked franticly, "John please…please look at me…please..."

John's head shot up and seeing the look on Randy's face he bought his hand up soothing, "Hey, hey breathe Randy breath." He stroked Randy's' jaw line running a finger along the pouting bottom lip, smiling when Randy pressed a kiss to his digit.

"Shhh," soothed John again, leaning forward to kiss Randy's cheek as he murmured, "Relax. I was just steeling myself for this moment. It's been a while in coming'" he smiled slowly brushing his lips against Randy's ear as he whispered, "Just relax trust me and relax."

Randy took a deep breath then slowly he let the tension go from his body, leaning against John he let the strong frame take all of his weight, ready to finish what they had started so many years ago.


	6. Chapter 6

Tightening his grip around Randy's waist John slowly circled the quivering entrance then gently slid one finger into the vice tight entrance, breathing out a long slowly breath as years of waiting were finally over.

Randy felt the finger breach him it was like a painful heaven and he would have it no other way. Sure he had taken numerous things inside him before but to feel that burn coming from what should have been years ago was amazing. Randy clenched a bit around the finger before trying to make his body relax. This was John and for John he wanted his body to be willing for the sinful pleasure that was about to be unleash upon it.

John could feel Randy trying to relax but he knew the tattooed man wasn't as used to penetration like his boys were and this would need to be a slow drawn out process. He couldn't hurt Randy, he just couldn't, not even if Randy said he could take the pain he needed to resist and go slow.

"Feeling ok?" John swirled his finger around inside Randy.

"Fine," Randy rocked his body on the finger wanting to speed up the preparation process a tiny bit. "Just use more lube and give me two."

"No, we're going slow," John kissed Randy's cheek. "I'm not going to hurt you, not even a tiny bit if I can prevent it."

"You're too good to me," Randy smiled.

"It's no more than you deserve," whispered John pressing a warm kiss to Randy's exposed neck. Randy arched against him, his body pressing down on John's finger trying to take more rocking slowly on it. Nuzzling his face against Randy's skin John asked softly, "You think you can another in there?"

"I could take your whole hand," breathed Randy, "I just need you please…"

"Shh," soothed John biting back the comment burning his throat. Evan had told him about Randy's introduction to sex about how Hunter had fisted the terrified virgin. It was something John was planning on making the older man pay for when he saw him next. But as Randy gasped again John pushed all thoughts of vengeance out of his mind concentrating on the erotic dream currently grinding on his finger.

Pulling out he reached blindly for the lube coating two fingers and slowly eased them in, listening carefully to Randy's breathing. When there was no hiss he slowly started to scissor the fingers loving the way Randy rocked on his hand the hips sliding back and forth making Randy's cock rub over his abs. Taking a deep breath John ordered, "Randy look at me."

Randy's grey blue eyes opened to meet John's blue ones, both sets where gleaming with happiness. John had wanted them open to double check for pain but there was none whatsoever just passion burning in them.

Randy's lips were moist and half parted so warm and inviting John had to kiss them. Randy curled his arms around John's thick neck while rocking harder on the two fingers firmly inserted inside him. Their tongues slid against each other, locked in a happy war of oral dominance.

Randy submitted, letting John control the kiss making John lose some of control. Randy's sinful mouth fogging his brain as he scissored his fingers wider. Randy moaned into his mouth and grinded down harder wanting John to reach his prostate and to be in has deep as possible even if it was only his fingers.

John's focus was wavering as Randy's hips rutted against his, their cocks touching. Randy's wet head drawing a line of pre cum on his abs while his did the same to Randy. All the while they never broke the kiss. Without thinking or adding more lube John slid a third finger up into Randy making the younger man break the kiss.

"Oh fuck John yes, more," Randy threw his head back. "Open me all the way."

John groaned shifting his hips rubbing himself against Randy's groin. The move made both of them groan and biting his lower lip Randy breathed, "Fuck John, I'm ready, please baby I'm ready."

"I don't to hurt you," growled John not convinced Randy was loose enough yet to take him.

"I can take it," replied Randy, "Please need you in me…"

John didn't need a second invitation. Pulling his fingers out he blindly lubed his shaft up then asked gruffly, "You ready?"

"Never been more ready in my life," breathed Randy lifting himself up. He felt John position his shaft under him, felt the thick head brushing his prepared entrance. With a soft hiss he slowly pressed down gasping as John's cock pushed into his body. The pain flared then melted away within seconds leaving him floating on pleasure as John's shaft finally – years late – slid up into his body. Thrusting down Randy forced his hips down as far as possible sheathing the entire length of John in him in one go. Gasping he flung his head back curing loudly.

John swallowed loudly then asked, "You okay?"

"No," snarled Randy snapping his up," No I need you moving. I need to feel you in me, John, I need to feel you...please."

John groaned and gripped Randy's hips as he began rocking his hips making Randy moan out. "Slow and steady I want this to last," John rumbled.

"I know, but god I need more," Randy rose up and down slowly on John's cock trying to get more movement without taking the slowness John wanted away.

"Come here," John put his hand on Randy's shoulder bending him down so he could kiss him. Randy bracing his arms on the floor next to John, his ass sliding up so only half of John was inside him. John worked his tongue in Randy's mouth enjoy the taste while he started moving his hips so that he could stay inside Randy.

John kept Randy flat on top of him and took control and picked up his pace just thrusting enough so he as lightly brushing Randy's prostate. "John more please just a little harder," Randy gasped his wet cock rubbing between their bodies.

"Just wait for it. I'm going to make you shake with need," John growled playfully giving a playful smack to Randy's ass. Both of them know this was what should have happened all those years ago.

Randy lowered his head burying his face in John's neck whispering, "God John please fuck please…"

"Shhh," soothed John barely keeping it together. It felt so right after all these years finally being buried inside the only man he had ever loved. He screwed his eyes shut then, as Randy started to thrust back against him, John just let go. He let the tight control slip and suddenly they were fucking for real. Both of them were groaning with the effort of the coupling. Their senses filled with passion as the sounds of flesh on flesh filled the playroom. But it was more than sex; it was more than a simple fuck. It was love. And for the first time in his life Randy felt what it was to be filled by love.

Suddenly he knew what his boys felt when he made love to them. Suddenly he understood why his boys, his beautiful, stunningly loyal boys stayed with him. But more than that he knew what had been missing every single time Hunter had ever taken him. But even as he thought that, the one memory that he cluing to, the one soft hazy memory he held of his abusive master filled his head. Had he dreamt that night? Had Hunter really made love to him that night? Had the fiercely dominant man really made slow tender love to him rather then used him for the usual hard fuck?

"Randy?"

He jumped and pulled back blinking in confusion staring down into John's concerned face. They were still grinding together, John thrusting up into him but there was a look of concern on John's face and reaching up he ran a thumb along Randy's' cheek bone. And as he pulled it away Randy gasped as he realised it was moist. Realised John's thumb was glistening wet from his tears.

"I'm ok," Randy quickly wiped his eyes. "Just a little emotional, thank you, John."

"You don't need to thank me," John rocked his hips. He realized Randy was coming to his sense realizing the past and present as well as the grand future that lay before him. John held Randy tight and hoped that it was a future he could be a part of with Randy and his boys. After all he was here to love and help Randy just as they were. "I love you," John whispered his emotions running high within him.

"You do?" Randy felt the tears well in his eyes it was more than he ever imagined happening right now. After he had hit Evan he thought everything was over in his life. Yet that wasn't the case it hadn't been good but now everything was coming together how it should be.

"Yes," John said without any hesitation. "I understand if you don't feel the same."

"I do, feel the same," Randy buried his head into the crook of John's neck inhaling his scent. "But I love my boys to and I won't abandon them and I sure as hell won't leave them. Will you stay?" Randy moaned as John brushed his prostate.

"Yes."

"Do you think they're okay?"

Evan looked up and smiled fondly at Cody. The younger man had been pacing the pool area ever since they'd left Randy and John alone in the playroom. In his heart of hearts Evan knew John was what Randy needed. It hurt slightly knowing he couldn't give Randy what he needed but equally it made him love him even more, because it showed him just how big Randy's heart really was.

Seeing the distressed look on Cody's face he sighed and holding a hand out he called, "Baby come here."

Cody paused in his pacing then turning back he padded over. Taking the hand he let Evan pull him onto the swing seat, curling up so he was snuggled against his smaller lover his head resting on Evan's chest.

Smiling softly Evan brushed the thick hair and murmured, "They're fine. John's helping him to heal and …"

He didn't finish the sentence because at that moment the screen door opened and Randy stepped out onto the deck - stark naked and looking like a wet dream.

"Hey Randy we were just talking about you," Evan stuttered a little on his words looking at the nude and sweat covered Viper.

"Looks like you had fun with John," Cody smirked but was very happy to see Randy look a lot more like himself.

"Yeah I did. Move over," Randy sat in the middle of them on the swing putting an arm around each one of them. "I needed that. Boys I, I never meant what happen that night just lost control and I didn't play by the rules," Randy began feeling now he could do this. Especially with John standing inside house just on the other side of the door if he was needed.

"We know that," Evan snuggled into Randy's side. Randy looked to Cody to see if he would get the same understanding.

"We do and we want to help you deal with whatever happened in the past," Cody put his hand on Randy's thigh and gave it a squeeze.

"Ok in my past I was a servant to Hunter you two know that. I swore never to be like that. I went mad with power. It doesn't mean that I don't want to play like that again though but it will be very different next time I swear on my life," Randy sighed and he heard two okays. "I have one thing to ask you and if the answer is no then we will all have thinking to do," Randy looked down at the tiles of the pool deck while Evan and Cody looked at each confused as to what Randy could want. "I want John to stay."

There was a moment's silence then Cody said uncertainly, "Umm Randy John is staying with us, he's not staying at a hotel he's..."

"No," chuckled Randy, "No I mean I..." he swallowed hard then looking at Cody he clarified, "I want John to stay with us as part of us a permanent part of us."

He felt Evan pull away and it killed him. Looking round at the smaller of his two lovers he bit his lower lip adding, "Evan I..."

"You want him to...to move in with us?" asked Evan slowly not actually looking at Randy. He was looking past him, eyes glued on the still water of the pool.

Randy nodded then realising Evan wouldn't see the nod, he reached over caressing his face, adding softly," I want him to join us not replace us. Boys I...I can't tell you how much I love you both. I mean it but I…I need John as well. I need…" he looked up and saw the man he needed standing in the kitchen obviously waiting for them to finish talking, waiting to see if he would be accepted as part of the family.


	7. Chapter 7

Randy's head snapped round as he felt Cody pull away from him, as he watched the younger man slide off the swing and take a few steps away from him. He went to call his name wanting to pull him back down but a hand on his arm made him stop. Looking back at Evan, Randy stared at his broken nose and feeling his resolve crumpling, he rumbled, "I never meant to hurt you. Evan I swear…"

"Do we get to have sex with him as well?" interrupted Cody, his voice sounding strangely flat.

"Ummm," Randy was at a loss for words. He could say sure you can have sex with John but he didn't know if it was something John would want. So instead he mumbled, "Well if he wants to and you want to, either of you. I mean if you let me I have you to let you," Randy was hoping that came out right.

"So it wouldn't bother you to see us have sex with John?" Cody turned and looked at Randy and Evan on the swing.

"If everything is like before just with added John, then no," Randy looked Cody in the eye. "Why would I? It would be no different from finding you and Evan getting up to no good while I was out," he gave a nervous laugh. In his heart Randy needed this to work, he needed all of them. He'd thought when John had come to visit that they wanted John as a part of this as well. Maybe he was wrong.

"Cody," Evan spoke looking at the pacing man. "I've thought about it. I'm willing to give it a shot."

"You sure?" Cody walked closer to the swing.

"Yes I am sure," Evan nodded. "But if I find it not working I will be saying."

"Ok," Randy turned and gave Evan a kiss grateful he was willing to try. "Cody?"

Cody stared at him his mouth set in a firm pout. Randy gulped softly. He wasn't used to Cody being quiet. Of all of them Evan was the quiet one, the thoughtful one. Cody was the loud, exuberant one. He was never quiet, not like this. Subconsciously Randy was squeezing Evan's thigh, the big hand gripping the thigh so tightly Evan actually whined in slight discomfort.

Looking up at his younger lover, Evan sighed and called soothingly, "Cody it doesn't change anything, with us I mean. Randy still needs us..."

"To fuck!" finished Cody petulantly, "That's all we are, Evan! We're just things for him to fuck but we're not good enough to fuck him. Not like John. Oh no John gets to fuck him but not us. Evan, if this happens - we're going be nothing but kept rent boy."

"Cody..." breathed Randy, his voice thick with pain. The idea that Cody could ever think he would treat them like that hurt more than any physical slap or punch ever could, "No. No that's not true." He stared at his youngest lover adding desperately, "I love you. Baby please you know I love you I…"

His voice faded into nothing as Cody glared at him. Beside him he felt Evan shifting and then Evan slid of the swing. Padding over to the sulking figure Evan reached out and linking his hand with Cody's, he murmured," Do you really think that? That that's all we are…"

Cody nodded angrily, sniffing loudly.

Evan sighed again then looking back over his shoulder he gave Randy a soft smile before looking back at Cody. Without warning he slapped Cody fondly around the back of the head, his hand lingering to caress the dark hair as he snapped, "Then you're a fucking idiot!"

"Ow," Cody grumbled looking at Evan. Cody turned and looked at Randy how was sitting there with a frown on his face. "Why aren't we allowed to fuck you?"

"Cody after all we did to get…" Evan stopped as Randy stood from the swing.

"I never said you weren't allowed," Randy looked Cody in the eye. "I guess I just never gave either of you the opportunity because I get nervous."

"Bull you say it all the time during sex you're the boss and you fuck us," Cody glared.

"Heat of the moment baby," Randy came close and Evan stepped aside so Randy could stand in front of Cody.

"So we get to fuck you?" Cody looked Randy dead in the eye.

"If it will make you stay then yes," Randy reached up to stroked Cody's face. Cody looked in Randy's eyes and saw pain, he could tell he was being honest but there was more.

"But you really don't want to bottom for me," Cody shook his head. "You would do it but you wouldn't enjoy it."

"Hasn't happened yet I don't know," Randy wanted Cody to stay more than anything. He wanted his happy world of the four of them.

"I won't make you do it," Cody turned and kissed Randy's hand. "I'll try."

There was a moment silence then Randy smiled slowly asking nervously," You mean it? You'll honestly try...for me?"

Cody nodded then, giving a little huff of near bitter laughter, he confessed, "Fuck Randy I just want you to be happy and if that means I have to put with John "being" here then fine I'll try but if it doesn't work out.."

"It will work out!" breathed Randy almost desperately, "It will I'll make it work I promise." He turned and held a hand out to Evan, pulling him closer. Curling an arm around Evans shoulder, he brushed a kiss into the dark hair rumbling, "For both of you. I mean it I will try so hard."

"So will we," promised Evan grinning at his two lovers. He gave a low little giggle and pulling away, he said," I think I go see John I think he's starting to panic in the kitchen."

He took a few steps away but stopped when Randy caught his arm. Turning back he smiled as Randy slide into place against his body. Cupping Evan's face Randy stroked a bruised cheek and breathed, "What did I do to get someone as good as you in my life?"

Evan blushed and stealing a quick kiss he shrugged and replied, "No idea but whatever it was – I'm glad I'm here. Even with this" he pointed to his bruised nose.

Before Randy could respond Evan pulled away and padded towards the kitchen chuckling to himself. As he pushed the door open John spun around and exclaimed, "Oh god! Please tell me the answer was yes!"

Evan looked at John who was wide eyed and hoping everything is ok. "It's a yes but…" Evan began.

"There's a but. Should we talk about the but in the living room so they don't hear?" John looked past Evan to Randy and Cody who were embracing on the pool deck.

"Sure come on," Evan led John into the living room.

"Ok tell me the but," John looked into Evan's warm brown eyes.

"Cody and I are going to try this if we all click living together great, if not well we will cross that bridge if it happens," Evan looked at John who was nodding. "Cody and I want to know if you have any desire to be sexual with us or if Randy is your only concern?"

"Like you and Cody, I love Randy. To be honest I don't know how romantically I feel about either of you I just haven't been around you both enough," John shrugged. "On a sexual level do I find you both attractive, yes."

"Just hypothetically speak," Evan swallowed. "Would you be opposed to having sex with Randy if Cody and I were in the bed too? I mean we would be doing our own thing or maybe just watch or well if welcome to assisting," Evan awaited John's response.

"Shit," breathed John puffing his cheeks out, "You don't hold back, do you?"

"Sorry," shrugged Evan, "but I need to know. I need to know how much you being here is gonna change what I...what Cody and I have with Randy. Until now it's been near perfect but now…" his voice faded and he gave a little sight.

John nodded and rubbing the back of his neck he murmured, "I honestly don't know. I 've never been in a situation where there was more than one other person involved," he gave a soft almost embarrassed laugh confessing, "I guess for once I'm the baby of the group I don't know half the shit you guys get up to and…" his voice faded into sigh at the look on van face.

"Oh," replied Evan a half blush creeping up his face as he asked, "You think we're strange, don't you? You think we're odd for doing this for liking this. For wanting what we have?"

"No!" exclaimed John, quickly grabbing Evans arm as the smaller man turned to go, "Evan no. Please look I come from an old fashioned family I've only ever know old fashioned ways of sex okay. You know two people doing it. What you guys have...got to admit I'm kinda jealous because having seen the three of you together, despite everything that happened the other night…"

He paused and swearing softly, he absently cupped Evan's face. His hand dwarfing the smaller man's feature, "Shit Evan I'm jealous as hell. You guys have something amazing and I…I won't lie I want in. And I'm prepared to try anything once but like you said if it's not working, if it becomes too weird I'll tell you. I promise, no lies no hiding no creeping behind each others backs. I want this to work and I…"

He didn't finish his sentence. Before John could get another word out, Evan just launched himself at him, kissing his face as he exclaimed, "Thank you! Thank you! That's all I wanted to hear. Oh god thank you..." Without even thinking what he was doing John wrapped his arms around the small bundled of energy and held him closer. Burying his face against Evan's neck he inhaled the unique scent he suddenly hoped he would get to know a whole let better.

Evan pulled back a bit with a smile. "This will make Randy happy," Evan looked over his shoulder. "I just hope Cody adjusts to this because I can see him being the one with the hardest time."

"We'll have to let him have extra time with Randy then that should help when we all, um, go to bed," John scratched his head. "Are we all going to fit in the master bedroom bed?"

"Yes that thing could hold Big Show, Mark Henry and Khali and still have room for a few more," Evan laughed.

Outside Randy felt the breeze roll over his exposed body while Cody nuzzled into his neck. "So you see where I'm a little worried," Cody finished his story.

"Yes I do. That won't happen Baby," Randy kissed his hair. "Everything will be even and equal."

"I know for you it will, it's the rest of us," Cody pulled back. "John doesn't have feelings for Evan or I. What if he gets them for one of us and not the other?"

"Cody, don't worry about things that haven't happen yet," Randy pulled him back in. "It will work just have to believe," Randy kissed Cody's lips trying to assure the young man everything was fine.

Cody kissed him back, loving the way Randy's naked body fitted against his dressed one. As the kiss finally ended, Cody pulled back sighing, "I want to believe but..."

"No buts," rumbled Randy, "Cody pleases, just give it a try don't 2nd guess it."

Searching Randy's face Cody nodded then murmured, "Fine but if it isn't working…"

"Then we talk," agreed Randy. He gave a relieved smile leaning in to steal a kiss. Turning he looked back towards the house musing, "I wonder how Evan's doing with John?"

"Want me to go see?" offered Cody

"N'ah," smiled Randy "I'll go. How about I get them to bring dessert out here? We can all just relax and chill."

"Sounds good," grinned Cody he gave Randy a smirk adding, "Never know we may end up with a food fight again."

Randy just chuckled and headed back toward the house.

John and Evan were just padding back into the kitchen as Randy came in from the deck. Looking at the two men Randy realised he couldn't tell what either man was feeling. Suddenly feeling very nervous, he asked gruffly, "Well?"

"We're good," John smiled.

"Unless Cody changed his mind," Evan bit his lip.

"No he's ok," Randy walked towards them. "I think he has doubts but we'll over come those."

"Yep," Evan agreed.

"You guys want to eat dessert out on the deck?" Randy looked at both of them.

"Yeah sounds like a good plan," John went to the fridge opening to retrieve the items to create dessert. Evan walked over to help John out with the ice cream sundaes while Randy snuck over to a jar of cherries.

"Hey don't eat those," Evan scolded as Randy was about to eat a cherry.

"You know I love cherries," Randy popped the fruit defiantly into his mouth.

"In more ways than one," Evan replied walking over to take the jar away.

"You didn't complain," Randy laughed.

"Whoa, wait," John turned to face the pair. "You took Squirt's cherry?" John made air quotes grinning.

"Damn right I did," Randy stood proud while Evan blushed fiercely.

"So you've only had sex with…" John started.

"No," Evan snapped. "I've had Cody too."

"I was watching," Randy smiled stealing another cherry. "Then I joined in."

"Wait you've been…by…" John was pointing back in forth between Randy and Evan.

"Yes I have, and I liked it," Evan pausing as he put the lid half on the jar. "We've done lots of things so you might get use to looking shocked John."

"Yeah but...you're tiny!" exclaimed John.

"What?" asked Evan indignantly, "What do you mean I'm tiny?"

"I mean you're…well you're... I mean compare to them... they...they must ripped wide open..."

"They didn't" assured Evan with a little huff, "They were careful and took their time and…" he gave a little sigh of happiness and winking a Randy finished, "…it was wonderful."

"Really?" asked John intrigued, "I would have thought it would have been as painful as hell."

Randy chuckled and stealing another cherry – yelping slightly when Evan smacked his hand and snatched the jar away from him, finally screwing the lid firmly in place – "You've never bottomed John you don't know how good it feels to be filled up to be…" his voice faded as a memory stirred. A memory filled with screams and pain and humiliation. Letting his gaze slip to the floor murmured hauntedly, "But you're right done wrong it can rip you apart body and soul it can…

"Okay so chocolate ice cream or vanilla?" called John grinning desperately trying to take Randy's mind off what ever memory had just flooded his mind.

Evan smiled gratefully at John. Padding over to Randy he slid his arms around Randy's waist and hugging him he whispered, "Randy look at me…" he waited for the haunted grey eyes to look at him before whispering, "You didn't hurt me that night. You've never hurt me during sex. Please you've got to believe me."

Randy stared at him and reaching out he touched Evan's bruised cheek rumbling softly," but I have hurt you. Seriously hurt you…."

"Even if I say yes you physically hurt me it doesn't mean I'm leaving you or that I feel any differently about you," Evan got Randy to look him in the eye. "I understand you have past problems that's why we're all here together now to help you through them," Evan smiled at the older man.

"Ok," Randy whispered. "But I won't forget I just will try to push past it," Randy held on to Evan, hugging him tightly.

"Do your best even if I have to blind fold you," Evan winked trying to perk Randy back up.

"Ok take your bowls," John handed them each a bowl of ice cream. "I'll take mine and Cody's," John walked towards the door. He knew Cody wasn't overly pleased about him joining in. Backstage he and Cody got a long but there was always some unspoken competitiveness between them when it came to Randy's attention and friendship. John didn't have this same issue with Evan.

Stepping out on the deck John saw Cody sitting on a swing looking at him like he wish it was Randy or Evan holding his bowl of ice cream. John silently pass Cody his bowl and sat beside him.

"Thanks," Cody took a spoonful.

They ate in silence neither of them sure what to say to the other. Finally it was John who murmured, "I'm not trying to steal him from you, Cody."

Cody flicked him an evil look and pursed his lips but said nothing.

John sighed. He really didn't know what to say to the younger man. He was telling the truth he didn't want to be a home wrecker but equally he'd waited for this moment for so long, dreamt about it for so many lonely nights he wasn't about to let it slip from his fingers just to keep the peace between him and Cody. He gave another soft sigh and sinking back on the swing he glanced over to the kitchen and smiled. Randy and Evan had lingered in the kitchen and from his vantage point John could see them laughing, Randy was caressing, almost stroking, Evan's hair as the smaller man talk animatedly about something.

"What are those two up to?" he asked absently not really expecting an answer form the sulking from beside him.

"Being themselves," replied Cody softly.

When John looked questioningly at him, he explained, "Evan always manages to calm him down, to make him happy…" his voiced faded a moment then with a sad huff he snapped bitterly, "That's why it hurt so much when Randy attacked and shattered his nose," John frowned his mouth opening but Cody cut him off growling, "I hated him that night." he turned the brilliant blue eyes on John and with a million emotions swirling across his face, he asked bitterly, "Do you know how awful it feels to hate someone that you actually love with all your heart?"

"Yeah," breathed John, "Yeah I know exactly how it feels."

"You do?" Cody arched an eyebrow.

"I do maybe more than you," John sighed really not want to remember that night. "You didn't have someone you love tell you to basically fuck off and die while he rode someone else's dick," he didn't name any names because he knew the reality of the situation now.

"Randy back when he was with…" Cody was trying to delve deeper.

"Yes, I know now he didn't mean it," John looked into Cody's eyes letting his emotions. "But it nearly killed me and that's all I will say on that."

Cody nodded realizing that John and Randy after all these years over came a bad night. So that meant he, Evan and Randy could overcome their night of hell. Overcome it with John's help. Know what he now knew he felt more comfortable having him in the house but still had uneasy feelings that John would take his place.

"Looks like they are about to come out here," John took a breath and smiled. "If you love him you'll try," John looked at the glass door and Cody wanting to snap back at him for saying try and accept him. However John followed his words with, "and smile like everything is ok."

Cody's mouth fell open and as the kitchen door opened he hissed, "How dare you tell me how to act in my own house!"

John turned sighed when he realised how Cody had taken his last comment. He wanted to grab the younger man and tell him to stop being selfish and to focus on Randy. But before he could say anything Evan bounce dup onto the desk grinning at them both and asking, "So who's sitting where?"

"I'm on the swing," snapped Cody petulantly sinking back onto the swing seat, glaring at the back of John's head.

Evan frowned slightly but not wanting to let a dark cloud descend any further than it already had, he spun round and asked carefully, "Randy, where would you like to sit?"

"I don't mind," rumbled Randy slowly walking towards them. He was still feeling the recent coupling with John. It had been a long time since he'd felt such sensations and it was taking his tired body a little while to respond.

"Okay," mused Evan gnawing his lower lip, "Why don't I sit with John on the bench and then you can swing with Cody."

"Sounds good to me," replied John striding over to the ornate bench. Sinking onto the soft cushion he glanced at Cody and gave a sad smile.

Cody didn't return it he glared at him then turned and held a hand out pulling Randy down beside him. Randy complied slumping down beside his youngest lovers. Evan waited a moment then sensing the tension he padded over to the swing and leaning down he brushed a kiss over Cody's' cheek whisper, "Baby – don't start a fight tonight, please?"

"I won't," sighed Cody.

Randy over heard what was said between his two lovers and knew this would take a lot of adjustment. "So I was thinking we could all watch a movie tonight on the couch," Randy ate a spoonful of his dessert hoping that was a safe activity they all would enjoy.

"Sounds good to me," John said. "I'm game for any type of movie," John actually wasn't only liking certain genres but knew it better to help Randy get Cody and Evan use to a four way relationship by being more agreeable to things.

"I say we watch a comedy," Evan smiled hoping a light hearted movie would break the ice more around all of them.

"Sounds fine," Cody nodded not really caring just trying to cope with what was occurring.

"Ok we'll watch a comedy," Randy ate more of his dessert knowing only time would tell which of his lovers would stay and which would go.


End file.
